Welcome, Part 5

 

Now, I don’t mean no harm…(Warning: when a Black person starts a sentence like that, especially an elderly Black person, prepare to get your feelings hurt.)…I really don’t mean no harm, but for my White gay friends reading this:

We really don’t consider a bisexual truly gay.

I’m serious.

I should have placed the bisexual brother at number one, and put the down-lo at number two. I was trying to be sensitive towards you. I know you claim the bisexual as one of your own, and that’s cool. But you’re hanging with us now, so I’m gonna treat you on the straight-up.

(“Straight up” has nothing to do with sexuality, it just means “fairly and honestly.” Stop being sensitive! Geez!!!)

We believe that Bisexuals, even after all you have told us, aren’t really gay.

Sigh.

Go ahead, rail away….

See what I get for building a bridge between cultures?

Sigh….

Okay, look, this is just one of those things we’ll have to save for another conversation, after we’ve settled a few more basic things, like: why do White people think Jimmy “J.J.” Walker was funny?

“Dy-no-mite!” was downright embarrassing.

We were really, really upset when John Amos got killed off the show. When Esther Rolle said “Damn! Damn! Damn!!!” we felt exactly the same way.

Poor John Amos. From James Evans to Kunta Kinte…now he’s Charlie Harper’s girlfriend’s daddy’s lover….

Damn! Damn! Damn!

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